Day of Surrender

It’s 9.30am and as every morning Adam is sitting on his patio drinking his coffee. He is staring out across the fields. The sun is shining, the sky is bue. His mind is blank and peaceful when suddenly he hears…

INTERNAL VOICE
The ‘Son’ is about to rise in the East.

Adam puts his cup down on the table and looks around. It is the voice that has no label of identity. The voice that has guided Adam, the internal voice that has bought Adam feelings of peace, love and abundance through its dialogue. The voice he now trusted. Adam looks at his phone, it’s 11.11.

INTERNAL VOICE
Start packing, you’re leaving.

Adam lives in a mobile home, and everytime he leaves for a long period of time either for work or pleasure there is a set routine of things to do. On this occasion there was no logical reason to be leaving. He gets up and takes his coffee inside and cleans the dirty dishes. He opens the fridge and looks in.

INTERNAL VOICE
Leave the food and the fridge on.

Adam looks puzzled, but continues. He tidies up the mobile home, hanging his clothes up in the wardrobe and sweeps the floor. He goes outside and stacks the chairs, folds the umbrella down and turns the gas bottles off. As he walks back inside, he picks up his girlfriends shoes, puts them on the chair, takes the plastic flower from the vase and places it on the shoes. He looks at the fruit in the bowl on the table.

INTERNAL VOICE
Leave the fruit, something else will use that as food.

Adam is wearing shorts, t-shirt and flip flops. He takes his small ruck sack, puts a towel, some water and his phone in it. He closes all the curtains, picks up some car keys and walks out the door, turns and locks it. Due to a problem with the clutch on his van he has been borrowing a friends car. He walks across the path, throws his bag in the back of the car and gets in and drives off.

ADAM
Where are we going?

INTERNAL VOICE
You’ll see.

Adam gets directed towards the beach which is about a 5minutes drive. He has an idea on where he might be going. Assuming where he is going he plans to park where he normally would. Suddenly…
INTERNAL VOICE
Park there.

Adam pulls over and parks the car. He reaches into the back and grabs his ruck sack and gets out. He goes to take the keys out of the ignition.

INTERNAL VOICE
Leave the keys in it and the doors unlocked for someone else will need it.

Adam struggles alittle with this as it’s not his car, but does it anyway. He shuts the door and starts to walk. As he is walking he notices an old lady walking towards him. She is old and frail, hunched over and has a white stick which is guiding her way.

INTERNAL VOICE
Now I will show you the power.

Adam looks confused and looks at the lady as they pass each other. He hears the stick fall and turns around. The lady is fumbling about trying to pick up her stick that she has just dropped. Adam watches. The lady pics up her stick, looks at it all confusing, places it under her arm, stands up straight and continues walking unaided. Shocked, Adam turns away and continues walking.

A few moments later, a jogger passes Adam.

ADAM
If this is real, slow that jogger down.

INTERNAL VOICE
You don’t control this.

The jogger continues at the same pace. Further ahead Adam notices two ladies arguing on the side of the road. There are two guys on the other side of the road also arguing. As Adam approaches, he can hear them screamming and shouting at each other. As Adam walks between them the screaming and shouting suddenly stops. He side glances them as he passes. All four of them are looking at Adam. There is total silence. Adam tries to look behind him to see what has happened.

INTERNAL VOICE
Keep going and never look back.

Adam now realises where he is going. There is a steep hill infront of him, just over that hill is the cliff tops. There are little coves by the sea. He’s been there before and makes his way to his favourite cove. On reaching the cove, he stands for a moment and looks out over the sea. He takes his towel out of the ruck sack and lays it down. Puts the ruck sack next to his towel, takes his t-shirt off, flicks his flip flops off and sits down. He reaches into his bag and drinks his water.

Adam stares at the horizon for a moment and then reaches into his bag and takes his phone out, looks at it and lays it on his towel.

INTERNAL VOICE
It’s time, go into the sea.

And reaches for his phone to hide it in his ruck sack.

INTERNAL VOICE
You won’t be needing that where you’re going.

Adam sits motionless, staring, he stops breathing for a moment, trying to understand the spoken words. As he does…

ADAM
Oh my god, I’m here to die.

INTERNAL VOICE
Go into the sea.

ADAM
That’s what this is about. I’ve laid a trail, so someone can track my movements. The Mobile home, cleaned, food in the fridge, the fruit in the bowl, and the flower on the shoes. The car is parked, so someone finds it, open with the keys in it. And now the towel, my phone. The last trace. Oh my fucking god.

INTERNAL VOICE
Yes.

Adam puts his head in his hands and starts to cry. He thinks of his niece, his sister and his girlfriend. As tears roll down his face, he thinks about how he will never see them again. As the thoughts fade, Adam begins to relax , the tears stop and he falls into a feeling of acceptance. With a feeling of total peace, he gets up and starts to walk into the sea. As the gentle waves start to lap against his chest…

INTERNAL VOICE
Take your shorts off.

Adam takes his shorts off and is now totally bare. The water up to his shoulders. He turns around and stares back at the coastline.

INTERNAL VOICE
Close your eyes, let go and lay back into the water.

ADAM
Goodbye everyone.

Adam closes his eyes, stretches hs arms out and lays back into the water. He begins to float on the surface, water runs over his face. A feeling of total surrender echos throughout his entire body. Lost in this void of nothing. A few seconds pass and then water enters his mouth. He chokes, which brings him back to this reality. Opening his eyes, he reaches for the ocean floor. He can’t reach it, so he swims until he can. As he stands up and looks at the coastline.

ADAM
I’m not dead?

INTERNAL VOICE
No. You’ve proved that you were prepared to give up everything. All your possessions, your family, your friends. Your thoughts, your mind, your emotions. All that means the most to you, all that you think you are. You surrendered it all.

Adam starts to walk out of the sea, heads to his towel, sits down and stares out to sea. He reaches for his water but remembers he finished it. As he looks at the bottle, he’s surprised to see there’s still water in it.

INTERNAL VOICE
You will always have what you need.

Adam smiles to himself, stares out to sea and drinks the water.

Thanks to Adam Shereston for writing and sharing this spiritual story with us.

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